Certainties are few and far between in today’s thin-ice treading Hollywood. Franchises are toppling like dominos at a swift clip. Disney, of all studios, is in freefall. It’s only been open just over a week but Indiana Jones has cracked his last whip stumbling badly at the box office which I have to say saddens me and DC’s The Flash a week earlier had fallen foul of audience indifference. I’m not going to make a ‘flash in the pan’ joke. Damn. The Hollywood writers’ strike enters its third month probably followed by an imminent actors’ strike. The word upheaval barely covers the parlous state of the US entertainment industry right now. On a brighter note, each successive Mission Impossible movie from director McQuarrie has grossed well beyond two and a half times their budgets (between $682 to $791 million box office from each outing) and as we all know precisely what we’ll be getting extrapolated from the trailers, then confidence should be fairly high. Cruise’s Top Gun Maverick made a tad shy of $1.5 billion dollars at the box office so audiences are still happily accepting him as an action hero despite his turning 60 while making Dead Reckoning Part One. Well, if Harrison Ford can do it… Ah, scratch that.

Despite this mainstream review carefully trespassing on a site championing cinema’s outsiders, (Tom Cruise? Uh…) I’d like to justify it by keeping my eye on cinematic cultural developments and I am very interested to know if Mr. Cruise can buck an alarming trend of past IPs failing to secure modern audiences. Upon leaving the cinema, one of my party said they were entertained but that the film was utterly forgettable. Oh. OK. But there is much to enjoy in the latest instalment and not just the little yellow car. A Russian sub falls foul of its own A.I., physical access to which is only granted by the use of a cruciform key in two parts, each part sliding together to verify their own authentic provenance. This key is the MacGuffin, a physical object that is the key (duh) to the control of, or destruction of the greatest threat humankind has ever faced. So, pretty important then. I see little point in a plot synopsis beyond the following. Ethan Hunt is after the two key parts and once they’ve been fitted together, he has no idea what lock it might fit and what it may unlock. We know because we’ve seen the opening scene. His old adversary and friend, Isla is also on its trail but she’s having some trouble with assassins in the Namib desert, the go-to location these days for cinematic killers. Hullo, John Wick. Add to that the Fallout negotiator White Widow who has hired the skilful thief Grace to literally pickpocket her way to owning one of the two parts of the key. And of course the CIA have skin in the game. Add to the mix the killer Gabriel who ended the life of Ethan’s wife, who is working as a proxy for the Entity itself… Phew. That’s a lot of people after such a small item.

Okay, so here’s the rub. This key or its two parts represent controlling or stopping a threat worse than thermonuclear annihilation, the deconstruction and destruction of truth, order and human survival. It is an object of incalculable value to both good guys and bad guys. OK. Have I stressed that enough? You’re sure? So what in the name of everything holy does every person who comes into contact with the key or its parts do with these vitally important objects? They put them in their pocket. Let that sink in. They put them in their pocket. Let there at least be a high tech box with DNA encoded locks and reinforced steel guarded by the most human neck’s major artery tempted Doberman on the planet. No. They all put them in their pockets. Why? Because picking pockets is how the movie needs the key to travel between parties to up the stakes. It is so ridiculous, you’re virtually face palming all through the film. I so wish these tentpole action films would reign in their running times. We know who’s going to emerge victorious so the fighting and the running and the chasing can get interminable pretty damn fast. Despite how much I was entertained, I was never emotionally invested and must have changed position in my seat a double dozen times. It’s startling how good a critic one’s backside actually is.

Cruise is Cruise, the hardest working filmmaker in Hollywood always willing to push himself and others to find ingenious ways to court death. I have nothing but respect for the star/filmmaker and his rabid desire to keep cinema alive as a communal experience. Double Bravo. But there is another (two actually) reason to enjoy this bloated, bumper action fest - its cast. It so happens that in this instalment (it never pretends to be a standalone film with Part Two out next Summer) we have two actresses I really enjoy watching. That’s not supposed to sound politically incorrect. It’s just that I am attracted to attractive people (aren’t you?) and if you add a talent for convincing me that they are someone else, then count me in as a member of their fan clubs. The first is a staple character in the Impossible franchise, a rogue ex-British agent, Isla played by the very striking Rebecca Ferguson. Her turn as the sadistic Rose the Hat in Doctor Sleep had me wondering how such a sadistic monster could be so utterly alluring. And making her debut in the franchise in a co-starring role is Haley Atwell as Grace the pickpocket. I know critics are supposed to be formal (we’re not critics, we are champions of cinematic craft) but after a few seasons of Marvel’s Agent Carter, I was utterly smitten with Haley Atwell. Just that scene of her trying to keep her rabid desire in check after a god takes the place of scrawny Steve Rogers in Captain America The First Avenger is such a delight. For those seventeen people in the world who’ve not seen that scene, she cannot resist briefly touching Rogers’ chest, a moth to a new flame. Ethan’s team stalwarts are in place, Ving Rhames as Luther and Simon Pegg as Benji who both get moments to shine but the casting surprise was Pom Klementieff as Paris, an ultra-violent killer who gleefully revels in her moral vacuity. It took some time to recognise her as the antennae adorned empath Mantis, one of the Guardians of the Galaxy.

Bond tried it and now Mission Impossible is trying it – giving emotional heft to an impossibly resourceful hero who has never exhibited an emotional life above that of being an action star. Daniel Craig insisted on this lurch into ‘realism’ because “how else do I play it?” Well, the success of Craig’s tenure ensures his will be a fine legacy despite the fact that I shed no tears at the bloated finale. As a character dies in Dead Reckoning, there doesn’t seem to be the framework in place to actually be affected by this person’s death and so it passes by just to push the hero into ever more angry resolve. God knows how they are going to wrap this up next summer. The reason I mentioned being apprehensive in my intro is that in the past, technological advances were well behind what the Mission Impossible missions were showing us. At the dawn of the internet in 1996, Ethan’s networks could upload pictures in real time and at that time, it took minutes to upload pictures and hours to upload music. If you wanted to download a movie trailer, you could have a weekend away and you’d still be waiting. What about Dead Reckoning? Not only is the tech on display believable as not being light years ahead of where we are now – it’s pretty much spot on – it’s actually, more than any TED talk, made me aware of what kind of genie we are letting out of the bottle and it’s not Robin Williams or a blue Will Smith. It thinks, therefore A.I. Oh and it’s the first film I know of where the hero is menaced by a falling piano since the silent era. A sly homage to classic cinema. Entertaining enough, too long, not that forgettable and still too much of an action piece for an audience to be emotionally moved by. In other words, an expensive, fun summer blockbuster which, with Part 2 next year, may very well be the last of their kind…

* https://www.gamesradar.com/chris-mcquarrie-mission-impossible-dead-reckoning-interview/